I’ve been thinking about something for the last few
days. About how I keep saying I’m a shit
magnet. I worried that my declaration,
even in jest, would somehow magnetize even more shit my way. I may have been correct, because we started
popping up sick with the stomach flu right after that. It has involved, you guessed it….SHIT. This is turning into a shit opera. A shit fest.
A blog about….shit. However, I do have a genuine belief that I control
my destiny, and perhaps the entire universe, with my thoughts. Of course I’m being silly, but there is merit
to some of it. Someone responded to my
shit magnet post by encouraging me to direct amazing things my way by believing
that I am amazing. As it happens, it was
the exact thought I myself had been pondering for days.
The truth is that I don’t really believe I’m a shit
magnet. I’ve been victim to a fair share
of unfortunate circumstances (fate), but what I know is that I haven’t released
a magnitude of negative energy into the universe because of it. Quite the opposite. I’ve accepted my fate, done a bang up job of spinning it, and released it back. Queen of
spin. I am a positive thinker, and I
genuinely believe that we are surviving as well as we are because we are so
damned sure that things will be awesome.
I affirm this to my boys daily. I’ve
said repeatedly that ‘this’ won’t define us.
I won’t let it. Of that I am
sure. No one thing will hold us down. Not even a string of many bad things. Because we are survivors. Here is
something I know about survivors. They laugh. They laugh at inappropriate times. They find humor in dark places. They talk about stuff, deep stuff, like it’s
no big deal. Because it’s life. They don’t care, at all, what people
think. No matter what happens, they
believe they control their own destiny. They
hit rock bottom, and immediately begin digging their way out. I’m not talking
about preempting fate…but controlling how
we react to it. Everyone has that power.
At this point in my life, I have very little fear. I know
that things will be ok. I just know they
will. Hand to God. I know deep down we are good
awesomeness personified. I responded to
the poster this morning by saying that I would start directing awesomeness my
way by declaring that we shall be fabulously happy today and every day, my boys
shall have fabulous happy lives and I shall be pursued by dozens of fabulous,
hot, rich men who want to be awesome role models to my boys. That’s a start, right? I’ll report back soon with some awesome
tales. None of which will involve the
word SHIT.
PS: Just a quick update to say that I am indeed controlling the universe with my thoughts, so please do not fuck with me in any way, as I am one powerful mo fo. About an hour after I posted this the Greek Adonis texted to say he was detouring about a million miles out of his way to see me.
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For 5 years now I have been living my life to the "Law of Attraction". It is a mind set we have to train our brains to do at times, even when we don't believe it's possible. I read a quote 5 years ago that spoke to me so much so, I taped it to the inside of my medicine cabinet. I did this so that I would see it every day when I brushed my teeth and I would read it to myself. I realized 6 months into reading it, I was only reading it, not living it. (I rarely take quotes to heart to the point I did this one) I started to live my life to the meaning behind this quote. I was changing everything about my unhappy life. Ironically enough 3 years ago I dated a guy (who was unaware of this quote I read daily) and six months into dating him he said "I have a documentary I want you to watch with me. I life by the meaning behind it. and I think you'll learn a lot from it" As I sat and watch this documentary called "The Secret" I had chills. I had chills because this quote I had already been reading for a couple of years every single day, was the basic premise of what this documentary was about. And here this guy who had been I believe drawn to me for a specific reason was instilling in me where this quote came from. Anyways, the whole point of me saying all this is because I firmly believe what we put in the universe we get back. I don't think we even sometimes realize what we are putting into the universe unless we have trained our brains to think differently. I follow your blog and you have reasons to be down, but as with me it seems you and your family are fighters. Fighters always come back up. :)
ReplyDeleteYou are an effing strong woman with 3 amazing kids that are together growing stronger and better. A little step at a time, better today, even better tomorrow. No shit magnet. Awesome. Think of the kids and yourself. The rest, well, the rest is just the rest.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, I am too a "The Secret" fan... :)
""At this point in my life, I have very little fear. I know that things will be ok. I just know they will. Hand to God. I know deep down we are good awesomeness personified. I responded to the poster this morning by saying that I would start directing awesomeness my way by declaring that we shall be fabulously happy today and every day, my boys shall have fabulous happy lives and I shall be pursued by dozens of fabulous, hot, rich men who want to be awesome role models to my boys. That’s a start, right? I’ll report back soon with some awesome tales""
ReplyDeleteYES YES YES YES YES!!! write that down and put it on the fridge jerri, say it in the morning with the boys, cept change it to girls for them lol.
and keep laughing. never ever stop laughing. cause laughter is truly the best medicine. :)
The law of attraction, the power of intention - it all works, really. What you put out there to the world is what you get back from it. I guess it's really all that "positive thinking" we've heard about forever but thought was all crap. Turns out it might just be true!
ReplyDeleteYou are doing a great job with your boys. You are a survivor and you're right about the inappropriate laughter and dark humor - it does help to get you through the rough stuff.
For a long time I also was proud to be a Survivor, and then someone told me there was a step after that - a Thriver. I think maybe y'all are more on the path of being Thrivers than just Survivors :)
ReplyDeleteOk, so you know I'm stealing that right?! I LOVE THAT. My new mantra! Thanks.
DeleteWe reap what we sow, yes? Keep sowing that goodness and light, Jerri, and it will keep coming right on back to ya. You ARE a survivor, and now like Icefacade says, you'll be a Thriver too ;) What's the line to that hymn? "For more than conquerors we are." You will be more than a conqueror!
ReplyDeleteDina, I hope so. There is an awful lot to conquer. But I want it badly.
Deletei love this! Your kids are so lucky to have you.
ReplyDeleteThanks! I'll tell them you said so, LOL ;)
DeleteI have to tell you that I LOVE you. YOU, not your blog or your stories or your cursing--YOU. Amazing woman. (This is not a come-on.) You tell the whole fucking truth, you value what's REAL, you don't care what other people think (gasp). Just go on being yourself, becoming yourself-only-more-so, and light the way for the rest of us. And for fuck's sake, keep writing.
ReplyDeleteOMG thanks so much. Such a compliment. I love you for saying it ;)
ReplyDeleteDirector of Awesomeness does have such a classier ring to is than shit magnet. I was semi-trashing my body in front of my 21 year old daughter the other day (who has a perfect body. i swear had i ever been built like her I would have walked down main street in a thong) and it occured to me the crappy message I'm sending both her and myself. I've been trying to turn it around into something more positive. It seems to be working. I hope the director of awesomeness is working for you. TraumaCurls24
ReplyDelete