January 14, 2013

The Sisterhood of the Sacred Women Tribe

Welp.  The sun came out Saturday for a while.  We were able to wear shorts and flip flops.  The Kentucky muthas were here, and we conducted sacred patio meetings while the sun’s healing energies swirled around us.  Good times, folks.

If your ears were burning, it’s because we were talking about you.  If it’s a problem that affects the Sisterhood of the Sacred Women tribe, then you better believe it is important to us and we are hell bent on fixing it.

I hope that you all will report back to me that you are conducting your own sacred patio meetings in your own communities, with members of your own Sisterhood of the Sacred Women tribe.  Because the world needs us.  We can’t stretch ourselves too thin.  This is very important work, this mutha stuff.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll get back to pondering big darling’s latest piece of artwork, which I stumbled upon this morning.  It is a beautiful drawing and next to it he’s written out the letters of his name, and next to each letter he has written some positive qualities about himself.  I cannot read them without thinking about Dave.  Because these are all the words I probably used to describe Dave when I first met him.  

The muthas couldn’t believe how much big darling looked like Dave.  They were wondering if it was okay to tell him how much he resembled his daddy?   Heck, there’s no rule book here, mostly because I haven’t written one.  So I quickly surmised that being like his daddy is pleasing to him.  We’ve had some intimate conversations at night when we’re saying prayers and talking about our day where I have told him that having daddy’s good qualities is a blessing, and that nurturing those qualities and seeing them mature and blossom unhindered by stress and addiction would allow him to grow into the man that daddy should have been.  I’ve explained that he mustn’t be afraid to be like daddy, because he has all the tools he needs to procure a different outcome.

Please Lord, let that be true.  I’ll spend my last dying breath making sure it is true.

Even though I’ve been lazy and ridiculous, I had to take down my Christmas tree and decorate for Mardi Gras before the muthas arrived.  Taking down the Christmas tree was as annoying as putting it up.  There were several seconds when I considered dousing it with gasoline and setting it ablaze.  I’m not sure how sedated I was last year when I boxed it up, because I did put it properly back into the box last year.  This year, it appears that the tree grew, and the box shrunk.  As I kicked it down the stairs and unsuccessfully tried to tape the box up, I screamed out how much, “I hate daddy” right in front of big darling.  Then I muttered something aloud about how I was pretty sure this wasn’t what God intended for the celebration of His birthday.

The muthas have tasked me with being the girl who changes Christmas.  So, no pressure there, right?  But I’m pretty sure some changes are going to be made in our house.  Rewriting the Holiday Season is going to require quite a few meetings of the Sisterhood of the Sacred Women tribe.  So stay tuned.


  1. Another great one!! I very much LOVE the idea that you've found a community of other women living with & adapting to the same circumstances. Phenomenal outcome from a horrendous event in all of your lives. You always inspire me. You always make me laugh. Many times your beautiful, raw writing makes me cry. Mostly I'm very grateful to have found your blog.

  2. I LOOOOVE what you've told your son about how it is a good thing to take his daddy's good qualities. I know there's no rule book... yet. You would be the mutha to write one though.



  3. Great post! I hear you about getting the tree up and down and getting it back into the darn box. Struggling with the same issue (and tape), we got one of those tree storage bags. It zips up, so no tape! It accommodates varying sizes of trees and has... wait for it... handles! It's been great! We got ours at Target. If a bag will work for where you store your tree you might be glad you got yourself one! Happy New Year!
    Justin- Writing Pad Dad
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  4. 'Please God, let that be true'. I can't adequately explain how much that resonated with me. We're all out here doing our best to raise these precious angels we're blessed with but not one of us has a clue what the hell we're doing, right?

  5. I think what you tell your children about having the good parts of daddy and that they can become a better person because of it... I think that is wonderful and very true, I am going to explain this to my daughter... she is not her father, she is the best of both of us and she is her own person (sweet, loving and kind)

  6. Happy Monday Gorgeous! Hello sister!
    I love a three day weekend-now if only the kiddo wasn’t fighting off a cold!
    Hope this finds you doing super awesome and hopefully enjoying some rest and sunshine!
    Ciao ciao for now~
    P.S. Remember, TEEN WEEK starts Feb 1st and the giveaways are HUGE plus celeb written teen posts!

  7. My dear dear mad woman. I have gone through so much in the last three months I want to just sit and have a good cry with you because I feel you would be the only one to understand. No one died, worry not but strange as it may sound I feel that by reading your blog I can take a deep breath and I can say.....If she can do it so can I.

    I found something out, that made me wish for a moment that I was dead, and then I thought of you. I am doing okay but the point of this ramble is to simply say I love you, thank you for inspiring me, for living life, waking up every day with the darlings and not giving up. It gives me hope, it gives me strength and I genuinely just love you.


    1. Syn, you mustn't make me blush! I'm sorry for your troubles and glad you are traveling this journey with me, with all of us.